A Bias Toward Action

When was the last time you tried something without being reasonably confident it was going to go well? When did you last sign up for something without a solid understanding of what you were getting yourself into?

This is a challenging question for many people, especially high achievers. After all, you likely didn’t get to where you are now by racking up a string of failures. Yet, especially if you are pretty successful at most things you try, it’s even more vital to consider this question.

Research and learning are in my bones. One of my oldest friends still teases me about the time I asked for homework in Kindergarten. I like knowing what I’m talking about, being prepared, and being able to predict what comes next. In general, it’s worked out pretty well for me. Being able to predict what you’ll be good at has probably worked out pretty well for you too. But--what experiences and opportunities are we missing out on because they’re outside the scope of what we know we’re good at? What haven’t you started because you’re not sure how it’s going to go?

The month before I started college, I got a huge packet of flyers in the mail from my university, advertising various campus activities and departments. Buried deep in the stack was a flyer for a program called the “Community Service Leadership Training Corps” (such a long name!). The details were sparse, but the application was short and I had time--all my friends had already started college but my school didn’t begin until nearly October. I decided to apply. 

It changed my life. Not the program itself--it was pretty much a disaster and had little additional structure beyond the paragraph on that first flyer. Rather, signing up for something without knowing what I was getting into set off a chain reaction that continues to have positive impacts nearly 15 years later. 

The program was a mess, so after the first few meetings, I went to the director with some suggestions. On the spot, he offered me a job coordinating it. I had never had a job before and had no idea what I was agreeing to, but decided to say yes anyway. 

I spent the next four years running that program--my boss was a great mentor, but gave me basically zero direction. Since nothing about the program had been written down, I had the amazing opportunity to build it as I went along--first by myself, and later with some fantastic co-leaders. There was a lot to do--I didn’t have time to focus on the fact that I didn’t really know anything about community service, leadership, or creating a program. 

There was no other option but to figure it out as I went along--to teach myself what I could, bring in experts where it was necessary, and make things happen. With a weekly deadline and a cohort of participants to serve, I learned to take comfort in the fact that done is better than perfect, that often no one else knows what it’s “supposed” to look like, and that if you have responsibility for something, people are spending a lot less time than you fear wondering if you’re qualified for the role. 

Most importantly, I learned that it’s impossible to predict what you’ll learn from an opportunity. If I’d paused before accepting the job to consider what I’d learn or how it would connect to my future goals, I likely wouldn’t have said yes. I would have gotten lost in a pro/con list, or been stuck in the purgatory of asking everyone I knew whether I was making the “right” decision, and I would have eventually declined and gone in search of something else. 

Instead, this opportunity set off a chain reaction. Learning I liked working with students led to a master’s in student affairs. Comfort with building a program from scratch led to an opportunity to start a research center at a top university. Conversations about civic engagement with the guy next door in the dorm led to marrying him. Taking the leap worked out. 

Coordinating that program brought me into the world of experiential education--of learning by doing. Since then, I’ve noticed a direct correlation--the less I know about what I’m signing up for, the more valuable the opportunity will be. I’ve seen this in consulting projects that have turned into long-term partnerships, attending events I knew nothing about and forming life-long friendships, even taking the leap to start my own business. Releasing expectations about the intended outcome and instead being open to where the road may lead has led to incredible opportunities that have taught me more about myself, my skills, and my interests than I would ever have learned elsewhere. 

We spend so much of our early lives doing what we’re supposed to do--learning to read, to multiply, to follow directions, to memorize facts. Then we graduate from college and all bets are off--there’s no longer a set syllabus you can follow to master the knowledge you need to succeed. You transition from rote learning--of learning facts and following formulas--to experiential learning--testing ideas and seeing how they work. This is a hugely jarring transition for most people. For high achievers used to success,  it can be challenging to navigate this world of no right answers--and even more dauntingly--no assessment for success. 

This leads many people to--intentionally or unintentionally--stick with what they’re good at. To avoid trying things when we’re not sure what they will lead to, or if it will work out. It keeps people stuck in unfulfilling jobs because they’re “not sure if they will like” that other path they’re curious about. 

But here’s the thing about experience--after the experience, you’re a different person. You have knowledge, you have data about what worked and what didn’t work. If you approach the same challenge again, you’ll have a different perspective than you did before. It’s impossible to predict what knowledge you’ll have as a result of that experience because the only way to get that knowledge is to get that experience. So looking at an opportunity and trying to predict the impact it will have on you is an exercise in futility. You just don’t know. You can’t. But that’s not a bad thing. A bias toward action--toward experimenting, testing what works, collecting data--that is always beneficial. Even if you have a poor experience--you take a job you hate, you move to a city you don’t like, if you can reflect on the experience and learn something, it’s not a waste of time. You’ll be in a different place than you started, with additional skills and insights. Different opportunities will be available to you, and you’ll have learned more about your priorities and values in the process. 

We live in a culture that emphasizes huge goals--dreaming big and working backwards to figure out what you need to do today to make it happen. That can be incredibly helpful, of course, but there’s also so much to gain from being open to new possibilities, even if--especially if--you’re not sure how they’re going to turn out. As Freire writes, we make the road by walking. 

Where are you stalling because you’re worried about the outcome? What could become available to you if you got confident you’re on the right path for you, but gave up on knowing where the path leads?  

Try it. You never know where you will end up. And that’s the point.

PS--Open to possibility but not confident you’re on the right path for you? I can help with that.